What is the meaning of friends in your opinion? What is the meaning of bestfriends?

In my life, i had found some versions. There are some terms that could be mentioned “friends.” Since i was toddler (perhaps around 3 or 4), I still remember it clearly that my friends in my neighborhood didn’t really like me. I still remember they made me cry and then left me.

When i entered the kindergarten, I was a really a quiet person. I didn’t speak to my friends and my teachers. I played with my friends but I was just playing with no conversation with them. I still remember at the very first time I had spoken, one of my friends suddenly said “Hey look! Metta spoke!” That was the begining.

I and my closest friends from kindergarten had so called friendship until elementary school. But who knew that, such innocent children can be monsters in this phase. I still don’t have any idea what I had done to them that someday one of them told me that they just pretended to be my friends. They talked behind my back. Did i make mistakes to them? Maybe this matter had led me to be very sensitive person. I hate people like them, backstabbers, fakers, prentenders, betrayers. Maybe it was not enough to torture me at that time. The teachers also didn’t like me. Do you know how it feels when people around you hate you so much and you expereience it when you were so young? I was still a little, very little girl.

Nothing can heal that pain. It was just forgotten (while in fact I still remember it). Yeah, I always try to forget it. In Bahasa, aku mulai menutup diriku sejak saat itu. I can’t be open to people. I select them to be my firends, and then closest friends. I select some my closest friends to be my most trusted friend. There are layers of friends in my firendship. Why I did that? I don’t want hurt people, and I don’t want to be hurt again. So, if you had been my so called friends during this thime, you may see that I’m nonchalant. Maybe some people thought that I don’t have feelings, too. I give you the answer, you don’t know me.

So, what is friend? What is friendship?


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